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Speaking or Writing to Me: Terms and Conditions
Please retain for your records.
Your license to speak to an Ingwersen is subject to compliance with these Terms and Conditions. You acknowledge and agree that an Ingwersen may terminate your access should you fail to comply with the Terms and Conditions, or with any other guidelines and rules established by an Ingwersen at any time.
1. You agree, through the act of speaking to or writing to an Ingwersen, that you will not transmit any material which is knowingly false and/or defamatory, unlawful, harmful, hateful, harassing, threatening, abusive, vulgar, obscene, repetitive, dull, shrill, unfunny, or otherwise objectionable. You agree not to transmit to an Ingwersen any re-enactments of more than fifteen (15) seconds in duration of any comedy bits from television, motion pictures, or other technology now known or later developed.
2. An Ingwersen shall not be liable to you for any loss of revenue arising out of or in connection with your interactions with an Ingwersen.
3. In cases where you have authorized a minor to speak to an Ingwersen, you acknowledge that an Ingwersen's speech may contain material that is inappropriate for minors.
4. An Ingwersen may be spoken to solely for noncommercial purposes. Your speech may not transmit to an Ingwersen any message for commercial purposes or any message that contains advertising.
5. An Ingwersen is not intended for use as a sounding board for creative works. An Ingwersen shall have no responsibility for any similarities between any screenplays, novels, jokes, short stories, comic strips, short humor pieces, or other creative works described to him in violation of his Terms and Conditions, and any works subsequently sold by an Ingwersen as any such similarity shall be purely coincidental. By telling an Ingwersen any ideas for screenplays, novels, jokes, short stories, comic strips, short humor pieces, or other creative works, you waive any claims for credit or consideration of any kind as a result of an Ingwersen's sale of any similar material in any medium.
6. By speaking to an Ingwersen, you grant the royalty-free, perpetual, irrevocable, nonexclusive, unrestricted worldwide license to use, reproduce, modify, adapt, publish, translate, create derivative works from, distribute, perform, and display the material (in whole or part) worldwide and/or to incorporate it in other works in any form, media, or technology now known or later developed, including in any parallel universes.
7. If you do not want your ideas to be reproduced, please feel free to never speak to an Ingwersen.
This text has been entirely plagiarized from
Tom Peyer is a co-editor of O Holy Cow: The Selected Verses of Phil Rizzuto.
Article URL: http://www.slate.com/id/2128421/